Critical Art
by Iris Amelia
Summary: Timmy and the Gang investigate a case of a stolen painting in the Dimmsdale art museum; so what do they do? They go into the paintings themselves! R+R PLEASE!


  
Critical Art  
  
[Shot of the Dimsdale art museum]  
  
Guard: (whistles) Hmm...  
(A pair of eyes are seen in the background)  
Guard: (suddenly turns but finds nothing) Hmph.  
(The guard locks a door and walks away from the museum)  
[The camera slowly pans away from the guard and switches to the roof of the museum. The shadow of a figure is seen]  
Figure: Heh heh heh...Dimsdale is soo gullible! (opens the window on the roof) Ha ha ha...  
[The figure jumps down and avoids a couple of lasers in a professional style. The figure then strolls up to a painting and smiles]  
Figure: This is-  
[Quickly, Next day]  
Dad: Terrible!!  
Mom: Hmm?  
Dad: The painting "Love of My Life": stolen!!  
Mom: Oh my!  
  
[Timmy is in the living room watching cartoons]  
Timmy: Meh...oh well...it's summer...  
Cosmo: Hey, didja hear? A painting was stolen!  
Timmy: Oh?  
Wanda: "Love of My Life"! How awful!  
Timmy: Hmm...(snaps his fingers) I know! Let's go to the art museum guys!  
Cosmo: All-!  
Mom: Timmy! How thoughtful!  
Timmy: Huh?!  
Dad: Let's go to the Art museum then! Great idea son!  
Timmy: (slumps into the couch and sighs) Dumb voice...  
Cosmo and Wanda: At least we're going!  
Timmy: I guess...  
Cosmo: AND we get free food!  
Timmy and Wanda: No we don't.  
Cosmo: Rats! We get rats then!  
Timmy: Oh, boy...  
  
_______  
  
[At the Art Museum]  
Dad: (sigh) I still can't believe that "Love of My Life" was stolen!  
Cosmo: (as an event program) Maybe it was a very ugly painting.  
{Camera pans quickly to Wanda in a 'woosh'}  
Wanda: (as a wristwatch) Cosmo!  
Cosmo: Uh, STRICTLY hypothetically, though!! I never saw it!  
Timmy: Hmm..let's look around. (starts walking off down a hall)  
[The three walk down the hall of paintings and they all take quick glances at some. They then see an empty space surrounded by police tape]  
Cosmo: So that's where it is! Or was...  
Wanda: y'know..maybe we can figure out who stole it.  
Timmy: I CAN wish for-  
Cosmo: Yeah! There are so many witnesses!  
Timmy: Witnesses? In a MUSEUM?  
Wanda: Of course!  
Cosmo: The paintings themselves, Timmy! See?  
Timmy: But paintings aren't-  
[Cosmo and Wanda smile slyly and nod]  
Timmy: (smiles) Ooh...okay...I wish I can be ART! (blinks) Or-or in it...  
Wanda: You got it! (takes out her wand and zaps Timmy into a painting)  
Cosmo: We better follow!  
Wanda: Righty-o!  
[Both of them raise their wands and disappear]  
  
_______  
  
[Timmy reappears in the middle of a field]  
Timmy: Whoa...grassy...  
[Cosmo and Wanda suddenly appear beside Timmy]  
Cosmo and Wanda: Ooh...grassy...  
Wanda: This painting is called "Pink in a Field."  
Timmy: Why would the call it that?  
[Suddenly, about twenty pigs prance in front of them]  
Pig One: Pink-in-a-field! Pink-in-a-field!  
{Pigs snort}  
Timmy: Oookay...  
Cosmo: Next painting!!  
(POOF)  
[They all reappear in a painting of a city, but everything is frozen, as if paused]  
Timmy: Where are we now?  
Cosmo: This one is called "City."  
[Long lines of people are everywhere, taking up alot of space]  
Cosmo: But wait. Aren't cities-  
{A loud buzzer sounds}  
Wanda: Uh oh! 12:01!!  
Timmy: Huh?  
[The lines start to move very quickly, as if they were subways trains. The sound of subway trains is heard]  
Timmy: Aah! You guys-!!  
Cosmo: (floats over a person) Excuse me, did you see anyone steal-?  
Man One: (very quickly) Yeah, yeah, sure, sure!  
Cosmo: What did-?  
Man One: Tall-Tall-Tall-Tall-Tall- (walks away quickly in his line)  
Cosmo: Man...art's wierd!!  
Wanda: Talk about strange..  
Timmy: {off screen} (sounding restless) You guys! I think I'm getting carried away!!  
Wanda: No you aren't, Timmy. This was a good idea to come here!  
Timmy: No! Guys, I mean it!  
[Cosmo and Wanda look toward Timmy and gasp]  
Timmy: I'm getting CARRIED AWAY!  
Cosmo: Whoops! Hang on! (takes out his wand and makes a lasso appear in his hands and lassos Timmy, then suddenly hog-ties him)  
Cosmo: Yee-ha!!  
Timmy: Cosmo....  
{Cosmo unties Timmy}  
Wanda: Are you okay, Timmy?  
Timmy: (quickly) Yeah, yeah, sure, sure.  
{Cosmo and Wanda gasp again}  
Wanda: Let's get out of here!  
(POOF!)  
Timmy: Where are we now?  
Cosmo: This one is know as "Rush-"  
Timmy: That can't be good.  
Wanda: Well, actually, you didn't let Cosmo finish.  
Cosmo: Actually, it's called "RushING Water."  
Timmy: (has a shadaow overcast) Ju-u-u-u-u-u-ust great..  
[A tidal wave dumps right on top of them]  
Cosmo: (on a surfboard) Hang four, baby!  
Timmy: Isn't it-?  
Cosmo: Plus six!!  
[They drift off onto a grassy patch of soil]  
Wanda: Invigorating!!  
[Timmy spots a fish]  
Timmy: Hey...did you see anyone steal a painting?  
Fish: (blows a bubble) Which one?  
Timmy: That one. (points over the fish toward an opening, showing the black spot)  
Fish: Ohh...that one?  
Wanda: Well, duh!  
Fish: Yeah, the guy had a mustache, I believe.  
Timmy: All right!  
Cosmo: Mustache? Hmm...so now we know that the guy is-  
Wanda: Tall and-  
Timmy: Mustachey!  
Cosmo and Wanda: Right! Next!  
(POOF!)  
  
[They appear in a very colorful yet very abstract enviroment; triangles, circles, squaresm polka-dots etc...]  
  
Timmy: This is-  
Wanda: "Strange."  
Timmy: I know it's strange, Wanda, but-  
Cosmo: No, Timmy, that's what it's called! "Strange"!  
Timmy: Whoa... (sees a duck with a dollar for a nose)  
Cosmo: Hey! A duck-bill! (comedian drum-roll)  
Wanda: (floats to an eyeball on bird-legs) So he had wild hair?  
Eye: (in a Woody Allen kind of speech) Well, uh , yeah he-he just took the darn thing and he also well, he took the painting and....  
Wanda: (as the eye talks) Okay, we have enough information. Let's go!  
Cosmo: (glances back, sees a roll of toilet paper) Ooh! Toilet paper! (sarcastic drum roll)  
(POOF!)  
Timmy: Uh, guys...shouldn't we be out by now?  
Cosmo: Yes, actually....but if I'm not mistaken, this painting is called "BAM!"  
Timmy: Is that good?  
Cosmo and Wanda: No.  
Cosmo: Because it stands for, "Big Angry Mob."  
Timmy: (eyes widen as he sees the mob) Make with the magic! Now!!  
Man from the mob: Look! That kid has disturbed us all! Get him! Get him!  
Cosmo: Wow...a real mob!  
[The mob charges at them]  
Timmy: Guys!!  
Wanda: Hang on, Timmy! (takes out her wand)   
Timmy: Hurry!!  
Wanda: One!  
Cosmo: Two!  
[A man suddenly grabs Timmy's arm]  
Man: You'll pay!!  
Timmy: Aaah!!! Cosmo!! Wanda!!  
[Cosmo grabs Timmy's other arm] Two-and-a-half!!  
  
[A kind of tug-o-war sequence begins. Cosmo begins to get the upperhand but the man-power of the mob increases. Cosmo tugs again and starts to win, but then a sudden jerk makes Timmy skid straight into the mob, still hanging on to Cosmo]  
Timmy: I'm doomed!  
Wanda: (off-screen) You are not!  
[Wanda is in an elephant form and uses her trunk to grab Timmy and Cosmo, then zaps themselves out of the painting]  
Man from the mob: And don't come back! Yeh hear?!  
  
(POOFER!)  
[Timmy slides into a podium, displaying some vases and moans]  
Timmy: THAT was fun...  
Wanda: (appears) Well, guess what? I sent an APB.  
Cosmo: You sent A Pig Bricking?  
Wanda: (blinks) Not exactly...at all...policemen are now looking for the thief using OUR information!  
Timmy: Cool! We saved the day!  
Mom and Dad: Timmy!!  
[Cosmo and Wanda turn into balloons]  
Mom: Did you have a nice time here?  
Timmy: I su-u-u-u-u-u-ure did, Mom!  
Dad: Great! Unfortunately, it's time to go: 'Snake Bites' starts in 15!  
Timmy: Yes!! Let's go!   
[The family leaves the museum and head home]  
  
{At the Dimmsdale Police Station}  
Chief: Would you look at that, Steve...  
Sergeant: I don't believe it...  
Chief: So, you're the thief??  
Thief: Yes! Yes I am! It-It-sucked me in I tell yas! It did!  
Chief: You're telling me that this painting, "Love of My Life," sucked you in.  
Thief: Right!!  
[Chief and Sergeant look at each other]  
Sergeant: Okay...  
Chief: But..THIS is "Love of My Life!" A masterpiece!  
Sergeant: Indeed...  
  
[The camera slowly pans into the painting, which is just black]  
Cosmo: (off-screen) I knew it was ugly!  
  
END! 


End file.
